The Devil Wears Burrata

The Devil Wears Burrata is a great pub trivia name that comes to you (my friend Jenna) in a stream of consciousness/word association/word vomit exercise two hours before the cursed current events round.

It’s also a nice lil title for this nice lil post to round out the remaining days of summer.

Labor Day was yesterday which means summer is officially ending which wah because cold and dark but mostly wah because that means burrata season is also ending.

We all know burrata is the dairy of summer and is what you want to eat with all of those heirloom tomatoes hangin’ around (link to Susan Alexendra’s Grub Street profile of her just saying the word “heirlooms” 45 times)(also why is she dating BA’s resident jersey boi Alex D…I have questions).

Burrata is bomb, it’s bumpin’, it’s bae (should I bring back bae?). Who doesn’t love bursting open a large milk ball every June-August? I know I do.

Even the seasonal sweethearts at Sweetgreen bust out the big burrat this time of year with their “Peach + Burrata” (yes, that is how they stylize it) late-summer menu offering.

“It’s health and wealth in one perfectly balanced salad,” my friend Maya says (she’s not a big SG patron but she celebrates burrata season with their P+B).

My friend Abdallah, whose favorite meal is fried eggs with some kind of smelly canned fish, says, “they’re very skimpy with the burrata,” which like, ok fair, the more burrata the better.

But whether you’re getting your dose of spherical summertime dairy at Sweetgreen or paying $7.99 for a BelGioioso ball at Whole Foods, the time is coming to say goodbye burrata and hello baking head in oven. There’s a lot to mourn. 

The End of Burrata Season marks the end of Bread As Dinner (with toms/looms, oil, etc.) Season. It marks the end of an acceptable $17 Cheese on Plate Appetizer Season. It screams luxury and decadence and quite frankly I need that for more than a few sunny months out of the year.

So what do I reccomend? Eat as much ball-cream dairy as possible in these last warm weeks! Slather it on that day-old nub of bread you have leftover because you wanted a nice BLT but a nice BLT only takes two slices.

Plop some on your pasta! Take a deep breath and say “I am the burrata queen!” at the top of your lungs in the Trader Joe’s checkout line. Order the expensive appetizer and turn to your friend and say, “Wow these tomatoes are so fresh! I’m glad to be alive.” We must savor these last days before we have to bundle up and wear pants and listen to Mitski until that Pennsylvania groundhog does its little dance.

So what if the devil wears burrata! She’s allegedly also wearing Prada and probably a cool hat and some dangly earrings!

Other Devilish Things I’m Into:

  • The Devil in the White City – good book for boring people or a good one to mention to make it seem like you read books
  • The Summer that Melted Everything – book about the devil incarnate which I actually enjoyed a lot
  • Eating Shake Shack once a week

Other Devilish Things I’m Not Into: 

  • Deviled eggs – I’m sorry I just can’t..I even try to like the fancy ones on menus with crab meat or whatever and I just cannot….no…I’m sorry….no.
  • Devil movies – I am scared of you!!!!!!!!!! If I get possessed I cannot do anything about that and that is very scary!!!
  • When my cousin said the devil spoke to her at church when she was a kid??????
  • Devil’s food cake – like normal chocolate is fine?? I guess I would like it if they changed the name to something better like “Super Chocolate”

Ok that’s all for now! I have semi-solid cheese to eat!

Unrelated to cheese but kinda cheesy: I promise I will post more! I still don’t have a boyfriend or a baby so what is my excuse (for record I do not currently seek baby, unclear if I seek bf)!

Ok bye babes!

-Tori

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